honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I forget how to act sober
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