i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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