Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.