Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
