I can tuck mytits in my pants
Where is the hickey?
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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