this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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