i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
