Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
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