he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
