Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
