Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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