Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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