We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
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