I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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