NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
