if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
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I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
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