so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
