How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize
