so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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