Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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