okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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