it hurts more in the daytime
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
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