What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
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