He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
