smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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