shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
We need a shit load of segways right now
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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