My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
