I can text with my tongue
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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