ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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