I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize
