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• (765): View more from Indiana

  That was a long time ago. She needed the money.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.

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• (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (404): View more from Georgia

  Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.

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• (916): View more from California

  my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.

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• (903): View more from Texas

  Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (907): View more from Alaska

  I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."

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• (407): View more from Florida

  you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".

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• (904): View more from Florida

  ...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!

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