Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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