fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
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