i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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