I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?