Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
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He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
That's an oxymoron.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
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Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.