But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
