I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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