She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Randomize
