All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
