Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize
