I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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