If i could tip my vagina, i would.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize