wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
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