How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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