I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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