textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize