Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
