just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
