We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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