she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
